considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
not ubering you a puppy
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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