I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize