Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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