Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
