It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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