I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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