i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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