Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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