How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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