how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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