he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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