Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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