I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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