so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
