i just google imaged poop.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
