Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I didn't shave. On purpose
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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