glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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