it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
