my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
We are all done wearing pants today
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
