check it out our google latitudes are spooning
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Randomize
