my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
