i'm signing you up for texting rehab
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize