Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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