Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
