when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
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Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize