Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize