susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
