Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Randomize
