thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Randomize
