Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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