If i come over, it means nothing
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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