hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
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