she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
