after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
