that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
