Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize