Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize