I want to stick my p in your. b.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize