i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even know how to be here
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
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