Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
