first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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