i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
You're earring is so big in my mouth
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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