Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I am spending my child support on dildos
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
