I wish you could order shots online.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
My breasts were aching with rage.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize