I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
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When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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