Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
