Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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