Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
