Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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