When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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