Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
