gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
